Halloween: help young children with their fears!

Halloween is just around the corner,
and with it comes all of the media images related to halloween,  monster, witches and all sorts of ghoulish  characters!   Developmental  psychologist, Jean Piaget found that children  under the age of seven  had difficulty understanding  the difference between fantasy and reality.  This  can make all of the zombie decorations, ghost images and vampires with blood dripping from their mouths all the more scary for children.   Piaget's finding have stood the test of time.  In 2011, a study  in the British Journal of Developmental Psychology, by Harris et al,  "Monsters, ghosts and witches: testing  the limits of the fantasy-reality distinction in young children," found that when children from the ages of 3-5 were asked to distinguish real characters from fictional  ones, such as monsters, these children were only able to do so 40% of the time.   At  halloween, parents and  teachers try to help alleviate fears by telling children, "it's not  real," but sometimes  children need some extra help and guidance from us!   It's important not  to be too dismissive about their fears.

There  are ways we can help children understand and cope with their fears around halloween in a developmentally-appropriate and respectful  manner.  Allowing  them to engage in  pretend play  with costumes and props gives them opportunities  to work  through  their fears in a safe setting.  I've also used an activity with students where they sort  non-threatening halloween images into two groups:  "real" and  "pretend."   Here's a free worksheet that  you can use to introduce and discuss what items around halloween are real and what ones are not real:

From "Real or Pretend"  at www.teacherspayteachers.com/store/speechy

If you need more  ideas or materials  check out The digital download "Real or Pretend: Halloween Activities for pre-k to grade 1 at my teachers pay teachers store.   Halloween is also a great time to work  on recognizing emotions.  Jack-o-lanterns  portray  a variety of emotions (featuring full body depictions  of children expressing emotions using clip art by Melonheadz)  in the product  Pumpkin Emotions, also available  at my teacher pay teachers store.

Children's Books
Children's literature is another great way to help  children cope with fears and anxieties. Reading about a character in a book who faces their fears gives children their own strategies to try when  they are afraid.  My favorite is the Kissing Hand by Audrey Penn,  where Chester the  Racoon faces his  fears about separating from  his  mother to attend school.  Of course, the book "The Little Old Lady Who Was Not Afraid of Anything" by Williams and Lloyd, is another great book for tackling  fears of  halloween, (and  working on auditory memory and sequencing!).

I really like this interview with Yale researcher and author, Dorothy Singer" where she offers "Tips on making halloween less scary," on the website called " Mother Company."  It offers sage advice for parents and teachers!

                              Halloween Costumes and Sensory Issues

Finally, I'd like to share  a halloween parenting mistake from my past!!  My older daughter, had a rather traumatic first halloween at the age of  three.  I paid good money for a "Piglet" costume  (that she begged me for in Target) only to have her refuse to wear it on halloween night because it  made her "itchy."  After a large tantrum (referred to as the "halloween meltdown of 1999" around our house), we finally settled on her going as a witch.  She  wore her own (not so itchy) clothing and a witches hat that she could easily remove  when her head was too hot!!   We went to two houses and  she started crying after seeing some of  the scary costumes worn by neighborhood children.  I learned that night that I need to prepare her for halloween, not  just throw her into it and tell her not to be afraid!!   It's also okay  if  young children sit out of trick  or treating  or only go to a halloween  event designed for their age.  I wish I had seen information like this "Enjoying halloween with sensory issues," that is put out by the American Occupational  Therapy Association!!  Halloween can be a tough time for children with sensory issues!!

            Here's hoping you and yours have a safe and not toooo scary halloween!
                                                                     Donna